Quote 12 Nov

Thou shalt not solicit massages from strangers.

Quote 3 Nov

It’s like I’m stuck in some weird, miserable time loop.

Quote 22 Oct

Every time I tell someone that I want to get married soon, they say that I have all the time in the world. That I don’t need to rush. What they don’t understand is that the single most important thing to me about getting married is having my father walk me down the aisle. And for that…I have 2 months.

Quote 3 Oct

Usually, I make sure I give people an easy way to say no when I make a request or ask for a favor. Other times, I want something badly enough that I want it to be difficult to say no.

Quote 24 Apr

What kind of sick bastard wants to do it in front of a deer!?

–Monica, Friends

Quote 23 Apr

I love you McGee. Not like love you, love you. Not that I don’t love you, because I do. Kinda. You know..like the way I love…puppies.”

“I could’ve done without that comparison.”

“…But I love puppies.

–Abby, to McGee, NCIS

Quote 20 Apr

Hey! I was never happy…I was just less pissed off.

-Hyde, That 70’s Show

Quote 20 Apr

Its a self-serving man-made bullshit lie.

-George Carlin

Quote 19 Apr

Oh, I know. The doctor had to shine a flashlight in your vajayjay to get all the bats to fly out. I understand that keeping bats out of your womb is an important part of having a baby when you’re older than god…

-Swim Coach Ros Washington, Glee

Quote 18 Apr

Reach out and open the door no one thought could be opened. Life is behind it! We don’t have an eternity to realize our dreams, only the time we are here. If you risk nothing, then you risk everything.

–Unknown