Tag Archives: soul

Why the Single Life isn’t for Me

12 Sep

This post is in response to @buddy71, who on my previous post The Road to Peace, was interested in why having a significant other is so important to me.

It is a common question, especially from folks who either “love being single” or are currently in a relationship and “miss being single”. My disclaimer is as follows: I am a strong, independent, whole human being. I know who I am and I know what I want in life. I know where I’m going and where I’ve been. A significant other, while nice, does not define who I am, just as my choice in music does not define who I am.

The reason having a significant other is so important to me is actually quite simple. If you take all of the things I am and all of the things I do, you’ll find that some people bring out certain things more than others. I’ll use my love of video games and my love of being outside as an example. When I have strong relationships in my life, one of those may lie “dormant”. This means that if my best friend (or lover, or close sibling, etc) loves video games, I’m going to spend much more time playing video games than if my best friend (etc.) loves going hiking (in which case, video games are more likely to lay dormant because I’m spending so much time outside). Neither is more “right” or “better”, I am just able to express different parts of myself at different times.

This is why I like having a significant other. While my love for video games is great, as is my love for being outside, my desire to have someone to care for and love is a much more integral part of who I am. It is a part of myself that is very difficult to express without having a nice fellow in my life.

And it is a part of myself that I very much like to express, akin to my love of animals, and my quest for knowledge.

So yes, I am whole. That part of me is inside, and while unable to be fully expressed, I find myself caring very deeply for friends and very passionate about the things that I do. I just would like the ability to fully express it.

What are some pieces of yourself that are integral to your being? Do you ever find yourself in a similar situation to mine?

The Road to Peace

10 Sep

To say that I’ve been struggling lately is quite the understatement, as the universe seems to have handed me the perfect storm. Feeling the need to find a new job is one thing, as is feeling the need to move. But the overwhelming urgency to find a new job, a new car, a new place to live in a new town, a boyfriend, and wanting to get rid of your pets without the support of friends, said boyfriend, or said pets is a different story entirely.

I’m no stranger to this, though, and after a somewhat embarrassing gush of emotion to a friend I discovered that nothing would change unless I centered myself and focused my efforts on something. The problem isn’t these things. 

The problem was me.

I spread myself so thin worrying about all of these things, that everything was crumbling and slipping through my fingers, no matter how desperately I tried to hold on and pick up the pieces.

I needed to do some soul-searching and find my center again. Most people wouldn’t describe me as “spiritual”, if for no other reason than the fact that I’m atheist.

I would, though. I am a very spiritual person.

[Some might also call me superstitious, but that is a story for another day.]

What did I do? Well, I sat down on my bed and did some brief meditating over my tarot cards, and I did 3 spreads. In those spreads, I found my answer. I found what I needed to let go of, and what I needed to work on. And it was wonderful.

The next day, I got home from work, and did my very first yoga session, armed with nothing but me, a towel, and a very excitable, very eager dog.

Rinse, and repeat.

Today, I had a tai chi session, followed by a yoga session, followed by a delightful session of writing. Sometimes you strive for so much control, that you begin losing control. That was where I was. The universe had different plans for me, and to gain the control I am looking for in my life, it just turns out I had to give up the control, first.

The Connection

15 Dec

As humans, we are constantly searching for that connection with another that makes us feel whole. That “special” connection.

Me? I’m just out for a connection. A real, true, deep connection with someone.

I don’t think many people pass through our lives with whom we find that connection with. It’s almost like being drawn to someone, for reasons you can’t explain. It’s more than butterflies, more than a heart-to-heart chat. I think I’ve been lucky enough to have the connection with a handful of people, and it is most unfortunate when those people live nowhere near you.

I have a couple of folks who read my blogs, a lovely miss April and dashing sir Daniel, whom for reasons unbeknownst to me, I’m drawn to. It feels like we should be fighting the good fight together. Alas, we live in vastly different parts of the country. I can’t even say that we talk a whole lot…I read their stuff, they read my stuff. But it’s there. Something. Not sure why I feel drawn to them, but I do.

It is these kinds of connections I think we all are in search of. Something that surpasses speech and discussion. I can only liken it to an unspoken connection of the soul.

I think there are others. Other friends, lovers, strangers. Sometimes I think our consciousness drowns out these connections, as our logic and reasoning can do amazing things.

Have you found your connection?

 

Dating a Friend’s Ex

3 Sep

 

Its a really big thing in middle school and high school, but I can’t be sure about college and life outside of school entirely. Its like an unspoken rule: you should never date your friend’s, especially best friend’s, ex-boyfriend.

I kind of have a problem with that. Just because your friend’s ex wasn’t right for her, doesn’t mean he is wrong for you, and limiting your options isn’t fair to you. I understand that your friend might feel hurt, but life goes on.

Is this really a rule people follow after high school? Is it okay to date a friend ex?

I Need Your [Music] Help!

29 Jun

I’m working on a personal project which should [hopefully] transfer into a blog project. Before I can even get started, though, I need your help! If you consider yourself an “expert” or at least think you know a genre/your favorite genre very well, then I would like you to give me a list of 10 artists from whatever genre it might be that you think represent the genre as a whole (subgenres are also acceptable because, lets face it, music is so diverse). They can be what you consider “the best” or they can be a wide variety that shows how diverse the genre is…whatever you think represents best! Here is a list of suggested genres:

Country
Metal
Jazz
Ska
Punk
Indie Rock
Indie Pop
Blues
Techno
Rap
Christian
Soul
Funk
Reggae
Folk
Japanese Pop
Celtic
Indian Pop
Various Types of Classical Compositions
Music part of various subcultures

 

Please share!

24 Apr

Rain on the skin cleanses the soul.

–Me, as the rain falls