Tag Archives: perspective

Body Image: My Perspective

12 Sep

Body image in respects to having a “positive” or “negative” view of it is shaped by how we think other people see us, how we see ourselves, and how we think we should see ourselves. Hypothyroidism and weight gain go hand in hand, and I’ve struggled my entire life with both. Part of my struggle with the way I see myself, is that what I see in the mirror, what I see in pictures, and what I look at when I’m just sitting here or walking around and I look down. And before you read on, please understand how personal body image is.

That girl in the picture? Such is a fat kid (I refer to myself as a fat kid in the most endearing way possible).

That girl in the mirror? Definitely a chunk.

That girl I see when I look down? So average-sized.

I can’t really explain why the three images are so different. It does bring to light how altered the images of those with anorexia and bulimia are. If you haven’t thought about it, I challenge you to do so. What I see when I look down gives me sort of a “skinny girl” outlook. The way I hold myself, my confidence, and how I dress all reflect that. The person I see when I look in the mirror is what makes me confident to smile at people walking down the street. What I see in pictures is what causes me to assume that men have no interest in me as I pass them on the street, and how I accept that I am no 10.

So with that, I bring you what I see, when I look down. I’m sure that my perception of these pictures and your perception of these pictures is different, but I think its interesting, nonetheless. This is how I see myself:

 

 

How do you see yourself? 

What People Thought of Me

8 Sep

Over the past 10 years of my life, I’ve went from “everybody knew me and what I did” to “I was nobody” to “I’m important, enough”.

Going through ups and downs like that in a social perspective can be taxing, and it also puts perspective on how much people think matters: not at all. Generally, people seem to like me enough, and I don’t really think there is any reason not to like me. The people who don’t like me tend to feel that way because I’m not intimidated by them, or because of my confidence – simple things.  I also don’t usually put up with peoples crap, or kiss peoples asses justso they like me. That’s part of the “I don’t care if you like me or not” mindset.

I do have a story for you, though. Let me set the mood: I was in high school. Who was I in high school? I was involved in everything, from class President, to Student Council President, to manager of football, basketball, and track, to volunteering, to being Winter Sports Queen, and maintaining a 4.0 while taking college classes. I was that girl. I didn’t drink, I didn’t do or try drugs of any kind, and I didn’t smoke. I was a virgin then, and still am. I was pretty much the straightest arrow you could find. I was also not afraid to make a stand, though, which is usually the reason why people didn’t like me.

I dated this guy, “Dave”. His mother, for whatever reason, hated me. She really had it out for me. While I was dating Dave, my friend “Kelly” was dating Dave’s brother, “Richard”. Their mother loved this girl. Kelly and I weren’t complete opposites, but we were on different ends of the spectrum, for sure, and she had been in her share of trouble. If you talked to their mother about us, I’m sure I would sound like a trouble-making, sexual deviant and Kelly would be this sweet, innocent angel.

Although it bothered me, I got over it. I was just as nice to that woman as I was to everyone else, but it didn’t matter. Now, with Dave behind me, its amazing how I ended up way above his mothers thoughts of me. She thought I was a terrible influence, but I’m the one who is in college to become a veterinarian. I’m the one who is an independent woman, living on her own, with her life on the exact path she had planned. Richard and Kelly’s lives (although separate) definitely had huge speed bumps involving drugs, babies, and rehab.  Don’t get me wrong, Dave, Richard, and Kelly are all great people with what I can only hope are great things ahead of them, but I was always the bad one, and it was never for anything I actually did, only what they thought I was doing.

I also can’t lie: It feels great to know that I’ve proved her completely wrong, whether she is aware of the fact or not.

Have you ever risen up against what people have thought you were to prove them absolutely wrong? Ever had a significant other whose parents didn’t like you? What were their reasons?