Tag Archives: mental

Social Exhaustion

15 Oct

As an introvert, being in social situations can be exhausting. It isn’t that I dislike the social situations, however, and therein lies the problem.

Currently, I’m at a state where I’m forcing myself to see people. I would love to just hide away and do my own thing for at least a few days, and while I try and try…I know in my heart that I really should hang out with friends.

Hm…but should I? At what point am I not being true to myself and keeping myself healthy and sane? And maybe that feeling that I should want to hang out with people is just extrovert propaganda and proof that we live in a society that doesn’t understand the introvert.

Point being: I’m exhausted. Mentally, physically exhausted. And so far, my evenings are booked all the way into the weekend.

How do you deal with social exhaustion? Do you force yourself to hang out with people, even if you really just want to enjoy alone time? Why? Why not?

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Is it Cheating if it’s his Guy Friend?

24 Jun

After my old blog site started going downhill, a Facebook group was made so that everyone can be in touch while we all figure out what is next.

In that group, a woman posted the following:

I’m doing a survey: how many of you think cheating is flirting, mentally, emotionally, physically?

How many of you think cheating is just vaginal/penal/oral sex?

Please elaborate

Valid question. It’s something that differs between all people, because what is okay and what is not okay is different for all people. I find that those people who have been cheated on are especially rigid in their views, but of course, they’ve been hurt.

No one likes being hurt.

I hold to my guns that there are many gray areas involved with cheating, but we all know that’s my MO about everything. And before you get riled up, let me explain.

Person has sex with other person, but it was emotionally meaningless. While that person might not think it was a big deal because they don’t “love them”, he/she should still know that this would hurt the significant other, and should not want to hurt the person he/she loves. And thus, the significant other was hurt and feels unloved.

I would feel solace knowing that my significant other didn’t love the other person, but I would also feel unloved, because he knew it would hurt me. If he didn’t know that, we shouldn’t be together. Unfortunately, this could be a gray area…obviously not for me because I would never sleep around like that, but for some.

Person flirts with other person, but doesn’t realize he/she is flirting. Other person starts flirting back. Significant other sees this, and sees intent and a developing relationship.

This is another gray area, because some people are just naturally charming and flirty. Even being a gentleman could be considered flirting, or that care giving nature. But if that’s just who you are and you weren’t intentionally flirting or coming on to someone, I don’t consider that cheating. At the same time, intentional flirting is a no-no. Telling the difference is hard.

But, back to my title question. Emotional cheating is often considered the worst, or at least just as bad, as physical cheating. I’ll leave that up for you to decide. What I want to know is if the sex and sexuality of the people in question matters as far as emotional cheating is concerned.

Take this example: Person A is in a relationship with Person B, and is good friends with Person C. A and B have been arguing a lot lately, but they both still love each other very much. Person A needs someone to vent to one night about the workplace and about the arguments with Person B, and really, just life. Person C is A’s closest friend, so they hang out. Person A vents, while C listens intently. 

Months go on, and Person A seems to be going to Person C to vent a lot more than Person B, who A should probably be going to.

Case and point: emotional cheating.

Let’s say A is a heterosexual man, and B and C are heterosexual women. Cheating?

Let’s say A is a heterosexual man, B is a woman, and C is a heterosexual man. Cheating?

How about if A is a heterosexual woman, B is a man, and C is a heterosexual woman?

What if A is a heterosexual woman, and B and C are heterosexual men? Cheating?

What if A is a bisexual man or woman, and C is a homosexual same or opposite? Cheating?

What do you think about these situations? Is your gut telling you they are different? Why? Are they really different? 

Do You Self-Diagnose?

18 Apr

 

With the vast number of resources out there and the wealth of information, its no surprise that people often self-diagnose their illnesses. Some of us may seriously think there is something wrong (hypochondriacs), while others may just off-handedly comment on their “illness”.

A few weeks ago I went through a period of time in which I had so much energy and my mind was racing and I just had so many thoughts that I needed to get out that it was impossible. I felt like I was invincible. This went on for about 4 days, and then I woke up the next morning and it was like someone had sucked the life right out of me. I felt dull, I was exhausted, and my level of functioning seemed to be at 0. I didn’t want to do a single thing.

I went to work, and was telling a coworker about it, and she commented that it was scary. I thought that was weird, but then she commented it sounded like I had a bipolar episode. Later that day, I randomly commented that I was bipolar.

Now I wasn’t necessarily serious, but we all do things like that. Think of how many times you say something about your “OCD”. Maybe two days ago I commented on my OCD – I check my zipper multiple times per day. I don’t honestly know if I have a disorder (I probably don’t), but so many people say they have these things when really, they don’t.

Especially with things like webMD’s symptom checker, I’m sure that more and more patients are going to their doctors telling them that they have some rare and unlikely illness.

Do you ever [seriously or otherwise] self-diagnose yourself? Do you catch yourself saying you have OCD or something similar? Have you ever dealt with hypochondria in you or a friend?