Tag Archives: importance

The [True] Value of Friendship

29 Apr

Friendship is something I value greatly, but I’ve found as I’ve developed and lost friendships, that not everyone feels as strongly about friends as I do.

Recently, I had a bit of a falling out with a friend. Something inside of me is holding back from relaying all the nasty little details, so I won’t indulge, but really…it sucks! One should always surround themselves with positive energy and good people, so it isn’t unusual for me to stop being friends with people who bring me down, but I feel like when I say that, most people think that I mustn’t value friendship at all. That isn’t accurate in the slightest, though. It’s actually extremely painful to lose a friend, and no matter how mad I am at someone, or what they did, I always relish in the fun times that we’ve had together. Honestly, I wish I never had to deal with friends being…unfriendly…because it hurts, and I hate it, and I just want things to go back to being happy.

There is one thing I’ve found with every friend-problem I’ve ever had that just isn’t fair. The other friend never admits fault. I’ve always been the one to break the ice, and go in, and usually apologize for not talking to them or being mad or whatever it may be.  Okay…that’s a lie. I had one friend admit that she was acting poorly to me.

Regardless, it’s just not fair. And no…life isn’t fair, but I don’t want to lose a friend just because I want them to want to be my friend, but they won’t take the steps to make that happen.

That’s what it comes down to: they don’t want to be my friend, or rather, they don’t need to be my friend.

Every friend I have is a jewel in their own right. They come with their own set of rules that makes them them. And yes, I generally hand-pick my friends because I want to surround myself with good people and good influences. Any one of these friends means the world to me, and I don’t have a lot of investment in anything else: I don’t have a best friend and I don’t have a significant other, so each friend is massively important to me.

Unfortunately, I think that is the problem.

While I consider my friends so important and I want to keep each and every one of them, my friends don’t consider me as such. Or some of them, at least. That has to be the reason why friends don’t come to me and apologize. We all have those friends who have a million friends and/or acquaintances, and they have a best friend, and they have a significant other…and they don’t need you to be friends with them, so they don’t try and they don’t care, and if they do something wrong…whatever.

These friends don’t apologize, and it makes me feel so dispensable. That’s really all I want, is for my friends to consider me as important to them as they are to me. I know I’m not the only one with this problem – I’ve talk to some folks who are feeling the exact same way.

Unfortunately, some people value friendship much more than others, and that makes me sad.

Do you ever feel like you are dispensable to your friends? What do you do when you miss being friends with someone, but don’t want to have to be the one to break the ice again? What are your most common friendship issues?

The Petty Things in Life

11 Sep


 

Petty; (pet-ty) adjective

1. Of little importance; trivial.
2. Behavior characterized by an undue concern for trivial matters, especially in a small-minded or spiteful way.

 

Each and every one of us have something in our life that seems very important to us, but is actually petty to everyone else. We usually term it an OCD or just something we are ‘really anal about’, but that doesn’t change the pettiness of it. One such example of this comes from my job. We clean dirty pet carriers at the end of each day, and set them gate-down to dry. When I set them to dry, I must organize them by size, and preferably by style, or in a pattern. It really bothers me when other people don’t organize them that way, but I admit that it is a petty thing, so I don’t say anything.

My biggest reason for not saying anything, is because I know others will think they are petty, and there is no real reason they should care. Personally, I have a really big problem when people expect me to care about petty things (that are important to them). I don’t care. Sure, you can get me to care (maybe) but you have to sell your point like you are losing money and you are losing money fast. You need to make me understand why its important to you, and then I might care.

What are some things that are important to you, but petty to others? Will you perform a task, even if you think its petty and find no meaning in it?