Tag Archives: booty

A Brutally Honest Discussion about Butts

14 Nov

I couldn’t have chosen a better time to post this, now that Kim Kardashian has decided to “break the internet” with her butt. I vowed I wouldn’t look at the picture, but not paying attention to the size of her butt, I decided to see if the picture was relevant to this post.

Meh.

I have lived with a big butt my entire life, surrounded by folks with normal sized to small butts. I look at girls who are like “I have a big butt! Look at it!” and all I can think of is that????? because these are NOT big butts:

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not talking about quality. A small butt can be much better quality than a big butt and vice versa. You could consider some of these nice butts, but these are nothing more than normal butts, being stuck out dramatically.

So for all the folks out there, I have something for you to relate to that you may have thought was just you, because it isn’t something we really talk about (and for those of you who have a delicate disposition or a small butt or no desire to talk about the toilet, avert your eyes now).

Do you know how much toilet paper it takes to properly clean a big butt?

Growing up, my parents always gave me grief about how much toilet paper I used. But the thing is bigger butt = deeper butt crack = more area to clean.

If you can’t relate to this, you don’t have a big butt.

That was why my parents didn’t relate, and growing up I always felt like I was a weirdo for using so much toilet paper, but just the other day, I got into the car with a friend who also has a big butt, and I said just that. Do you know how much toilet paper it takes to properly clean a big butt? And she was relieved. And I was relieved. Because in that moment we finally both understood that we were not alone. The desire to be clean far outweighs “wasting” toilet paper.

I think that is an unfortunate side effect of having anything that is “too big” or “too small”. Whether its “too tall” or “too short” or “too fat” or “too skinny”. If it makes you feel different from others, there is no way you are going to talk about it. If you can muster up the courage, though, once you talk about it you’ll realize you aren’t alone.

And that is a wonderful feeling.

Can you relate? Do you have a big butt? Let’s see it and we all can decide! What is something that you think is weird about yourself, so you’ve never talked about it with someone? Let’s hear it and we can see if we can match you up with someone with the same quirk!

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