Tag Archives: bisexual

The Day “Gay Marriage” Became “Marriage”

26 Jun

Today is a day that will be written into the history books.

Those of us advocating for LGBT rights have long been looking for the legalization of gay marriage. It is so obviously a denial of basic rights, and is so tangible, that it has been the forerunner for civil rights denied by the LGBT community. Today, it became not something to fight for, but a door that has now opened. Because anyone can be married now regardless of sex, gender, or orientation, “gay marriage” is now just “marriage. And that is something to be excited about!

We took this away from those who have used it as a backbone to their arguments that LGBT people are apparently different than everyone else. Now, we can use this momentum to tear down other barriers to things like adoption, life saving blood donations, and instead of tolerance we can seek acceptance. A same-sex married couple doesn’t have any influence on anyone’s lives but there own, so what is there to tolerate? Nothing. Because everyone should be accepting.

The ruling by the Supreme Court of the United States today, wasn’t a landslide movement, however. Four of the nine members voted against it, and while their reasons are their own, it is hard to say why. These 4 people are holding that their reasons for voting against it was because it was unconstitutional to take away the rights of individual states to decide their own laws. It is hard for me to accept that this is their reason for voting against it.

Considering that in Loving v. Virginia the decision was unanimous, we still have a long way to go. I find it very interesting that in that supreme court ruling, that marriage was a “fundamental freedom”, and that the “freedom to marry or not marry…resides with the individual and cannot be infringed by the state” while citing the 14th amendment of the constitution lends me to believe that the 4 dissents were of no result of the constitution, but of simple bigotry.

Section 1 of Amendment XIV states:

All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the state wherein they reside. No state shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any state deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.

 

Sounds to me as though yes, the states screwed up. Yes, due process of law landed this issue in the supreme court. And YES, those states were denying the rights of their citizens, which is unconstitutional, and why no, today’s landmark decision is NOT unconstitutional. These 4 folks just found themselves on the wrong side of history.

Yay history!! Now my coworker can adopt another pet and her wife will be able to easily divorce her.

 

Dissents of the 4 supreme court justices.
Text of Amendment XIV.
And a really awesomely done video about it all.

 

Please, if you feel as though I got it wrong, I would love to hear your comments as I’m not a lawyer nor a judge (or any expert in the law, for that matter). Make sure you include reference material, though, because I don’t need a bunch of bigoted bullshit cluttering up my space. 

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So You Think You Can Sashay? Drag 2013

20 Oct

It’s no secret that I’m a big proponent of equal rights, and that I love the gay community with all my heart. Forever an ally! Each year I try to make it to the drag show, but usually I only make it in the spring. Last night, I went to the fall drag show and there were some amazing, fabulous performers!

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Michelle squared! Got our tickets ahead of time!

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Drag wouldn’t be drag without loads of glitter. So You Think You Can Sashay? Was this year’s “theme”.

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I’ve been to the drag show for about 4 years now, and this year there was a much larger population of women dressed in drag as men than I’ve seen. There was even a boy band toward the end.

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Another woman dressed a man – Pit Bull, in this particular performance.

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Words can’t even describe. This queen was a fabulous performer.

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As was this queen. She was the closing act, and her message was powerful. She opened with all the words and hateful things people are bullied with and told when they don’t fit into the cookie cutter shapes that the community seems to want everyone to be. Then, she sang Brave by Sara Bareilles and threw cards written with positive words into the audience.

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And, of course, you can’t go to a drag show and not get a picture with one of the performers, preferably one with lots of titties hanging out. This queen makes me look so drab in comparison (that’s how you know she is a good one!).

For your viewing pleasure, I have also included a couple videos that I took of the performances. The first one is a queen performing Lady Gaga. The second one is of a queen performing a Beyonce mashup. While these queens don’t seem to do drag very professionally, their dance moves are amazing and the hard work they put in to coordinate this is just amazing.

 

 

Finally, I want to tell you a story about progress. There is a huge movement working toward getting rid of the gender binary and raising awareness that not everyone fits into “I’m a female who likes males” and “I’m a male who likes females”. One of the issues involved here is how public restrooms are set up – usually a men’s restroom with urinals and a women’s without urinals. Last night, the restroom designations were covered with a piece of paper that said “gender inclusive bathroom”. Originally, I went into what was the women’s restroom and there was a line of like 30 people, so I turned around and trotted over to the men’s restroom. There I was, waiting in line to use a toilet, standing next to some guy at a urinal. That was interesting, but okay. There are some kinks that will need worked out if this is to gain popularity, like having a trash receptacle in each stall, but that isn’t hard to put into practice. Just knowing that everyone is okay with the bathroom situation is progress in and of itself, even if the attendees of this event are more forward-thinking than the general population [probably] is, is progress.

Ever been to a drag show? Would you go in the future? Have you ever dressed up and/or performed in drag? 

Video

What if the Gay/Straight Roles were Reversed?

24 Jun

So, You’re Not Aborting Your Gay Baby…

16 Jun

First and foremost, I apologize for the horrific and very literal title. I’m not feeling very inspired today.

Now, to the point.

Generally, pro-life people tend to be conservative. Those who oppose marriage equality also tend to be conservative. This isn’t a new thought, or an original one, but would you still support the pregnancy if you knew that the child would be gay?

And how can one support this child be brought into a world, but then deny them such a basic right?

Or. How can a person support bringing a child into life, with the possibility that they will kill themselves, simply because they are gay and the same people that called for them to be born are those who treat them with hate, make fun of them in school, bully them, and deny them the right to be with the person they love the most in this world?

No. All the 30-somethings, 40-somethings, and 50-somethings who are of this mindset aren’t bullying babies being born here and now, but they are raising their children to. Each bully has a parent, and children pick up so easily the beliefs of their parents, that whether you are a homophobe or simply someone who believes in “the sanctity of marriage”, it translates to the same thing.

They are them, and I am us. That makes us different. Different isn’t good.

So, when a gay child or teenager or adult kills themselves, how do you justify all the hate and all the intolerance?

Were they sinners? Is that it? Now they will answer to God.

Or was it selfish? Not only did they make a poor life choice, but they tried to get us to be okay with such an abomination, and then they tried to kill themselves with no regard of their families?

So, conservative folks…which is it? Keep in mind, I’m not saying all conservatives are pro-life and anti-gay rights, and I’m not saying all pro-life and anti-gay rights folks are conservative. I’m just saying that those two things are often the political beliefs held by the same person, but that in practice they seem conflicting.

Do you think these views are conflicting? What is your response to what I wrote?

What I Love About Drag Shows

5 Jun

I know they aren’t for everyone, but I absolutely love drag shows.

The performances are amazing and the drag queens look fabulous, but the thing I love the most is the sexual energy.

It’s free.

Men dressed as women and women dressed as men and men dressed as men and women dressed as women…it’s pure sexual energy and attraction and it flows so freely because its impossible to focus it.

All the gender roles and norms and sexual orientations that everyone is so concerned about upholding just melt away.

Have you ever been to a drag show? What is your favorite part?

Anti-Gay: Measure Passes in North Carolina Banning Gay Unions

9 May

 

Amendment One was has been voted on in North Carolina, and has been passed. This means that the only recognizable union by the state will be the marriage between a man and a woman. Gay marriage was not recognized by the state, but this may change the nature of other unions and domestic partnerships, which were once legal.

This is a major setback for civil rights in the entire country.

Apparently, 61% of voters voted ‘yes’ for the amendment to be passed. The North Carolina Democrat Party, however, is hoping to still fight the fight and does not support this amendment. A statement they released says

“Tonight’s results are an unfortunate reminder that the fight for Civil Rights in our state is not yet over. Writing discrimination into our Constitution is wrong. The State Constitution exists to protect the rights of our citizens- not to take them away. Despite this setback, north Carolina Democrats will continue to fight for all of our citizens.”

It is an unfortunate reminder. To think we live in a “free country” and still so much prejudice still continues.

Another statement was made, by a Christian organization, supporting the amendment:

“We applaud North Carolina voters for joining voters in 31 other states upholding the historic and natural definition of marriage as the union of one man and one woman…They recognize that marriage is the only kind of union that results in natural procreation and keeps a mother and father together to raise the children produced by their union.”

What? Natural? Keeps a mother and father together?

Homosexuality is a natural occurrence, and I’m also sure that marriage doesn’t keep anyone together. Hello…haven’t you heard about the current divorce rates? I cannot believe that this fight continues, and the ignorant, naive people of this country are still voting against rights that every citizen should have. There are currently 6 states in which gay marriage is legal, along with Washington, D.C. If its legal in Washington, D.C…why on earth is it not legal everywhere else? Thats the epicenter of our government!

Are you as outraged about this as I am? What do you think about the current state of civil rights in the United States? Do you think there will be any consequences for civil rights in the rest of the country?

Who Would You Come Out To?

18 Apr

Coming out as gay or lesbian or transgender or whatever you associate yourself as can be a really big huge deal. Whether it is parents, a close friend, or someone else, I’m sure that the decision of who to come out to first weighs heavily on the person declaring their sexuality. I’ve long told my friends that they can tell me anything and I will be there to support them.  Its not that I question their sexuality – that’s not my place – but if they begin to, I want to help them through anything they are struggling with.

I was thinking about it recently, and I’m not entirely sure who I would come out to first. Likely, I would just say screw everyone because its none of their business and continue on with my life as though I don’t even have a sexuality. I never discussed dating with my parents until 2 weeks after I started dating my first boyfriend. The only reason it got brought up was become one of them asked me if we were dating – to which I replied yes, for about 2 weeks. That’s just my personality, and I know that everyone is different. I remember defending my bisexual (now lesbian) friend in middle school to my parents, through angry tears.

But assuming that I did find a need to tell someone, who would I tell? Would I confided in my parents? My best friend? The internet? Maybe scream it from the rooftops?

Who would you come out to if you were to declare your sexuality? Who did you come out to if you’ve already been through this?