Tag Archives: attraction
12 Nov

The lady loins want what the lady loins want.

Right Guy, Wrong Time

21 Sep

I want to say that I hear about this all the time…girl meets guy, guy is amazing, but its just not the right time in her life, or she is too busy, or work or whatever.

But I don’t think I’ve ever actually heard this line outside of a movie.

For the first time in my life, however, I feel like this is just the case. I want nothing more than to find a nice fellow for myself, but it just isn’t the right time. I even want it to be the right time, but it isn’t.

Had I had a significant other before my dad got diagnosed with cancer, I would be so grateful right now – someone to comfort me, someone to be supportive when I just feel like I can’t move forward, just someone – but that isn’t the case. Even though I would love to have all of that right now instead of struggling to keep my head above water, I know that if I started a relationship right now I would be neglectful and needy.

That isn’t to say that I wouldn’t rule out love, if it just so happened to fall in my lap. I just don’t have the ability to seek it out. I find myself in my down time sometimes thinking ‘I should do this to get a SO’ or ‘I should put the moves on him’ and then I snap myself back to reality and get this gut feeling that its a horrible idea and sounds like a lot of work.

That is a statement I’ve never said before either: Relationships are hard work. Never before have I felt that way. Amazing, isn’t it?

Fortunately, there is nothing that sways my belief that if it is the right person, it will come in the right time.

Have you ever felt that it really, truly just wasn’t the right time to start a relationship? Was there someone courting you, and how did you handle that? 

What is a Nice Guy – Do They Exist?

27 Jun

Nice guys finish last.

Girls only like assholes, not nice guys like me.

You hear that statement all the time, and it’s usually from a very specific guy. Giving this person the benefit of the doubt, it’s usually a genuine guy who doesn’t use women for sex, wants an honest to goodness relationship with a girl, and while respecting women, finds himself single 90% of the time.

Unfortunately for nice guy, he is single because he won’t make the first move. It’s a vicious cycle, too, because the assholes get the girls because they actually ask them out.

Oh, and don’t forget the nice girls who actually do finish last. The nice guys want the bitchy girls who are high maintenance, while the rest of us, who actually refuse to date the assholes, end up single. We want a nice guy. But nice guys don’t want nice girls, now do they?

And don’t tell me that nice girls should make the first move. Been there. Rejected.

That’s all beside the point.

I want to know if this “nice guy” even actually exists, or if it’s just a ploy for us to feel sorry for them because they are single.

The person I picture in my head when someone says “nice guy” is a man who would give a woman a chance, be honest with her, never use a woman for sex, cares about what his significant other has to say, and would never lead a woman on. He would apologize if he did something hurtful on accident and he wouldn’t just ignore her. (Note: I did not say pushover, suck-up, or clingy at any point.)

Women – what is your idea of a “nice guy”? Men – are you a nice guy, why/why not? Do nice guys even exist? What about nice girls?

30 Day Letter Challenge: Dear Crush

13 Jun

Dear Crush,

I’ll call you that for now, simply because I’m a pansy I like to be mysterious. I wouldn’t even actually consider you a crush; crushes are what elementary school kids have on each other. This is different than that. I full on like-like you.

We haven’t known each other long, it’s true, but I’ve quite enjoyed the time we have spent together. It’s been a little weird, and a little quirky, but that’s how I like it. I mean, it describes us each perfectly, doesn’t it? A little weird. A little quirky.

I’ve been told I’m enigmatic, but I think you win me out. There are so many facets to your personality, that the second I think I have one figured out, another one shines through. I’m not sure how they are all connected, but I’ll find it.

I promise. Why? Because there is something special about you. I’ve never acted around anyone the way I act around you. Fear not…it isn’t a bad thing. It’s something I’ve always held inside, but I had to find a special person to bring it out.

Well, toodles.

Always, Me

What I Love About Drag Shows

5 Jun

I know they aren’t for everyone, but I absolutely love drag shows.

The performances are amazing and the drag queens look fabulous, but the thing I love the most is the sexual energy.

It’s free.

Men dressed as women and women dressed as men and men dressed as men and women dressed as women…it’s pure sexual energy and attraction and it flows so freely because its impossible to focus it.

All the gender roles and norms and sexual orientations that everyone is so concerned about upholding just melt away.

Have you ever been to a drag show? What is your favorite part?

A Date…What is That???

4 Jun

In my head, I have a very specific definition for what a date is. I think most of do, but as I was doing the mundane labor that is cleaning dog strays rooms at work today, I realized that not everyone’s definition of a “date” may be the same.

I became curious, so I looked it up on Google.

Some of the definitions relied on if there was a potential for sex at that point in time or in the future. Others were so vague that I couldn’t even differentiate between a date and just hanging out.

What is your definition of a date? What is the difference between going on a date with someone, and hanging out with someone? What do you think the best date to go on/take someone on is?

“You’re Cute”

3 Jun

What do you think of when you hear the word “cute”? What about “sexy” or “hot”?

From a girls my point of view, cute, sexy, hot, handsome, and gorgeous are not just points on a continuous scale of how attractive someone is. In other words, “cute” is not less attractive than “hot” and “sexy” is not more attractive than “handsome”.

To me, they are all just their own entities.

The reason I chose to write about this is because I feel as though men take offense when a girl calls them “cute” instead of “hot”. First of all, I’ve always been under the impression that girls love cute things. Second, I prefer a cute guy over a hot guy any day of the week – much more my type.

Guys – do you consider being called “cute” offensive or insulting? Girls – what do you mean when you call a guy “cute”? What about if the situation is reversed? Are “hot”, “sexy”, “cute”, and so forth separate categories, or is one just “more attractive” than the other? What’s your preference?