Drama and Social Networking

1 Jun

Drama happens to all of us – some more than others. Social networking has a tendency to focus that drama into one small, very intense area that can be overwhelming. Personally, I’ve only had a few encounters that resolved quickly. Others, however, have much larger problems that just don’t seem to be resolved, and I know that several of my fellow Xanga bloggers have erased themselves for reasons like this.

Its a fact of life that dramatic things will happen. The real question is one of how to deal with it. I have a very firm stance on how I deal with it, and that’s something that is unlikely to change.

Rule 1: Avoid it.

Rule 2: Ignore it.

Rule 3: Deal with it.

Rule 4: Ignore it, again.

Rule 5: Get over it.

By avoiding drama, it usually doesn’t happen as often. This usually means I don’t put myself in the middle of the fire by adding people who I know love to be dramatic. I don’t want it around me.

By ignoring drama, I make a conscious decision to not engage unless absolutely necessary, so unless something is way out of control, I just continue on with my day. You say something offensive and stupid on Facebook? I remove you from my feed (keep in my, that doesn’t require removing someone from “friend” status).

By dealing with it, I plainly address the problem. I don’t address it angrily, and I try to be nonconfrontational, but there is a point in which something has to be done. Time to engage, be it via comment, message, and sometimes a passive-aggressive status update (not my preferred, since it usually makes things worse). If this person responds being more dramatic, melodramatic, or just rude, I may respond in a way that disregards everything mean they might’ve said, and try to be completely sweet. This sometimes diffuses the situation.

After dealing with it, I usually ignore it again. Sometimes, I don’t even comment back at what the person says. They don’t have anything to fuel the fire, and it will eventually fizzle out. Sometimes, I’ll remove them from my feed.

Then, I get over it. I’ll even delete someone (usually nonvital friends) if they are too dramatic and problem-causing. And I don’t look back. This solves my problems, and I really couldn’t care if they continue on with their drama, as long as I don’t have to hear about it. Many times, they have a bigger problem being deleted from friends, but that doesn’t mean its my problem.

There can be a point at which it becomes too much, I imagine. That point when you just have to delete your account, or make a new one and invite limited friends. I know some of you are going through this right now. It hasn’t happened to me, so I can’t say that I would never resort to this, but it seems like a very last option. I can’t think of a moment when someone could cause me so much trouble, that I would give up something I enjoy so much, like writing.

Have you/are you going through this? What is the point you reach when you finally decide to delete your account, stop blogging, get a new account, etc.? How do you deal with not writing/blogging/doing something you love? 

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